Beverley Jacobs life experience
At the tender age of 17 years I became pregnant by my childhood sweetheart, whom I was madly in love with through the process of time I was blessed with a beautiful bouncing baby girl. Living in a Christian home with a baby out of wedlock was not the done thing, I had a very strict upbringing, having a standard that was said “don’t do as we have done”, live the way we want you to live. Don’t get me wrong, both my parents can only do the best they know how and looking back they were good parents.
My relationship lasted 17 years; getting engaged several times, during that time deceits, lies, broken promises along with my insecurities, low self-esteem, with uncertainty lurking at ever corner, refusing to admit this is not how life should be, and there must be a change, settling for less and living in denial I got to a point that I substituted expensive clothes jewellery, cosmetics. Looking good on the outside but pain and crying on the inside with a broken heart, I could never find away out; just trapped by my emotions and fear, accompanied with a soul tie. God showed me that there will be change…..
We were separated, at the time very painful, in the midst of my journey painful as it may appear God kept me. I gave my life to the Lord. Oh happy days! I started attending church, I was so grateful to the Lord cleaning the church became my new found vocation. I was just happy to be saved.
One night I had a powerful visitation from the Lord, in the midst of the visitation I was in the company of two beautiful angels, one took my diary which contains every thing about my life, page by page it was ripped out and caught on fire. The word of God said….the old things are passed away behold all things have become new. A God that answers by fire. And that’s exactly what happened, I woke up one morning feeling on top of the world realising and saying to myself the pain is gone, which I was experiencing. I said to God you did that for me, I will serve you the rest of my life, God I will even go further and become a laughing stock for you. Church folks sometimes do?
“My daughter, my delight, you don’t need to compare yourself to one single person.” There is a wedding coming, a wedding where you are dressed completely, by my love. You are surrounded by my love. You walk deeper in my love. You are the bride I have chosen. You are the one chosen to marry the Groom who has come and broken His body for you, broken his heart for you, broken His complete self. This is so you may be ushered into the kingdom where celebration—singing and rejoicing—over the wedding of you, the bride, and my Son, the groom, await.””Oh, my dear, look to Me. The only way to protect yourself is to regularly look into my eyes, see Me looking at you, see Me desiring you, see Me writing your name upon my heart and feeling sorrow when you believe you are not good enough to be desired as much as her, or her, or him.”Hear me making noise and shouting in church, saying to themselves “what is wrong with this woman, I can tell by their expression”, it a secret between me and the Lord. When you lost everything your identity, through abuse, betrayal, pain, looking to a human being to give to you what they haven’t got, husband, even parents, they will fail, the only one that will never fail is Jesus Christ!
He will meet you at the point of your need, he will be the lover you never had, the joy you never experienced, your healer, he is the only one that can preserve you in this world from evils like no one can, after being battered, abused and misused, He will restore everything that the enemy has stolen from you; shame and reproach will be a thing of the past I am not a sales Rep. Trying sell you something so you can get a bonus from it at the end of the month.
I’m telling you about Jesus the way the truth and the life, the reality. If you are ready for that change to open your heart and let Him come in, I did ! My life was never the same ‘oh happy days.’